We Don’t Have To Look Back Now
Life.
This fairly violent cartoon is an extreme dramatization of how life as a Senior feels at the moment. I have been waiting for a good majority of my life to leave this House of Broken Glass. Every good child loves their parents to death, and I do, but with all the things I have had to deal with in this home I am just counting the days until I can finally move out (hopefully into a dorm, I can not spend more than another year here). Some people live a life that they can appreciate and in a home filled with true love and care for one another. I am not as fortunate. Just as a forewarning to my readers, I’m not typing this blog as a plea for help or looking for some kind of sympathy, I just figured it’s a part of my life, so I would post it up here.
I suppose if my parents ever found this they would give me some kind of lecture about how I shouldn’t be posting our lives up for public view. Well today, waking up to my mother yelling at my father about how he won’t get off his lazy ass and do the chores she asked him to do (over and over again like a broken record) and my father ripping a cabinet door off it’s (already broken) hinges, I realized that I am no longer some 10 year old cowering in fear on the couch as my mom leaves the house and my dad throws her purse in the pool, I am almost an adult and enough is enough. I am at my breaking point and it is no longer “our” lives, it’s “my” life that they are screwing around with when they do this.
I have stood by for as long as I can remember watching my parents do horrible things to each other, then turn around to hold some facade around other people. I guess this facade is somewhat a reflection of the good they have in them, and how they can actually be good, loving, caring, and responsible parents. These are the parents those of you who know me personally know, and please don’t treat them any differently after reading this. It is just a whole new experience once you have lived under their roof for 17 years and you have seen them behind closed doors.
The acidic relationship my parents have has traumatized me mentally, I believe. I know I am still in High School, but so far I haven’t been able to hold a relationship much longer than a month or two, because of insecurities within myself. I do not want to be in a relationship like my parents are in. I don’t want to be in a relationship where I would cheat on my wife, and she would respond by cheating on me….and still say i was completely in the wrong. I hope that came out right. I digress. They need each other only because of me and they’ve been together for so long they don’t know what the hell they would do without each other, as if time was glue: the longer two things are held together the more messed up the two things get when they are seperated (paper gets ripped off, glue stays on, it’s just a big mess). Another thing I have noticed in myself is that I am more and more jumpy when I hear a loud noise (due to my mother and father’s knack for throwing things around when they are arguing). At times, I would have a quick flashback of one of their worse fights when someone slams a door or something.
For fear that I will lose my friends due to them thinking I’m insane, and in fear that I will reveal one fact too many, because I can tell you there is a lot I can go into, I will just end my rant here. I love my parents, and they can be the best parents ever, but if they go through a little episode like this again I’m just going to run away to Boston or some place where we used to be happier.
Report Card =/= Value as a Human Being
These things actually ruin lives!!
Student A and Student B take the SAT, which is supposed to be a telling of his intelligence. An academic IQ test. Student A and Student B both have SAT books to study from. Student A reads the book cover to cover 20 times prior to the test. Student B uses it as a paper weight. They take the test. Student A gets a 1080 and Student B gets a 1270. Mind you Student B didn’t study at all. Take a stab at what the two Students’ GPAs are.
Student A: 3.8 Unweighted
Student B: 2.6 Unweighted
Student B would be me. I have a 2.6 GPA and live in a lower middle class family (which means scholarships are a must-have-but-can’t-reach). It is obviously not because I don’t understand the material, on the contrary, I understand it well. What is the cause of all of this? Well, first off I must blame myself for not working hard enough. Secondly, I live in Kissimmee, Florida, home to hicks and people who can’t read english let alone teach it. I know it is the classic excuse to blame my teachers but I think I have some kind of credibility coming from a school district where the average school grade is a D+. Not all of my teachers are below par, just a select few who have no business doing what they are doing. Lastly, and this is only a minor factor, we start school at 7 30 in the morning. The classes that I usually have low marks on are my 1-3 period classes.
I could keep on complaining but the fact of the matter is is that I am a Senior in High School and it doesn’t matter who is at fault; what matters is that I am in this situation. It is just an extreme injustice to think that there are geniuses in this world who can’t go anywhere because they are judged based on their GPA. They aren’t looked at for the fact that they aced their SATs without breaking a sweat. They are put into the same category as the idiots who can’t read Dr. Seuss books correctly (again, I live in Kissimmee, Florida, I am NOT exaggerating). Why do grades=a person’s value to society? This should be a system that is changed, so the right people get scholarships and go to college while the rest can stay where they belong: bumming off of Daddy’s many resources or popping pills on their stoops.
Working Title: AXIS and ALLIES: The Life.
A piece of script from one of my favorite cartoons.
I am attempting to write my very first script (possibly to be made into a movie featuring several of my friends) using a pre-production program and I must say it is tough stuff. There are a lot of things that you have to think about before you can start writing: Character analyses, Settings, Beginnings, Middles, Endings…I was sorely mistaken when I estimated I would be a quarter of the way through in one day. I haven’t even finished all of the character analyses yet! This is just another step into me trying out all branches of “the Biz” (first it was Acting, now it’s writing, hopefully next it will be directing). Okay, done ranting, now time to get back to work.
The (social) Circle of Life
These days, the world just gets smaller and smaller, huh?
There are some people in this world who thinks they have control over their social circle. Not control as in the leader of a cult, conntrol as in they know who would have fun with whom, the people who don’t mesh well, the people who will fight if put together, etc. It’s simple when you only have one circle of friends. Then you start to grow, and this nasty word creeps into your life: Networking. Getting a job somewhere, joining an organization, being active in the community…whatever it may be, you start to branch out at some point in your life. Yes this is healthy, but eventually strange coincidences start happening. You may be working at the community health center when you start to befriend coworkers there. You all hang out when you make a startling revelation: one of them cheated on their husband with one of your friends in your main circle. This creates an awkward situation for you (if not, I applaud your ability to keep your head up high and stick to whatever naivety or ignorance you cling on to). Now some of you may be so lucky as to never have that happen to you, but that was just an extreme example of the dangers of a “healthy” social life.
One Unfortunate Mistake
Sometimes you are thrown these signs from above and whether you believe in a higher power or not, you are compelled to do something about it. These are the good kind of signs.
The bad kinds are the ones that come to you when it is too late to do anything about them. They may happen subconsciously. You click a link on the internet, forget about it, or don’t even notice it, then look back on your computer a few minutes later and it’s right there, staring at you in the face with big eyes and a smile. Those taunting signs? Symbols of helplessness. Not a darn thing you can do. These signs can bring even the strongest man to frustrated tears, depending on what it is.
And no matter how sorry you are, or how much you wish you could take something back, or how well you learned your lesson, there isn’t a darned thing in the world you can do to fix whatever this sign is telling you to fix. You aren’t Batman. You have limitations, and you can only go so far before you start breaking the backs of camels.
Chronic Future (Net Neutrality)
The universal symbol for Net Neutrality
It is interesting to grow up in the so-called “MySpace Generation” because of the evolution of the internet. I remember a time when the internet was non-existant, and the common household computer was the calculator. Let me remind my readers (and viewers) that, at the time of typing this blog, I am 17 years old. This seemingly distant age of Yore was the early-mid 90s. A decade and some change is definitely not a significant amount of time. Now, computers dominate the world. They control economies, weaponry, and the social lives of millions of people.
Personally, I am a very anti-censorship kind of guy. If there is cursing on television then it’s the responsiblity of the parents to shield their children from it. If there is violence in a video game then it is the parents’ jobs to make sure they know what they are buying for their kids. If you personally don’t like violence or explicit language then leave the theatre, change the channel, or get a refund. The internet is a beautiful thing because of its freedom. There are practically no bounds to what you can do on the internet. It can be heaven for teenagers, hell for sex offenders, and a virtual brothel for those in between. This freedom, a freedom we take advantage of everyday, is on the verge of extinction. The regulation of the internet is becoming a not so distant reality and crushing Net Neutrality would destroy what little faith I have left in this country. I can deal with the perverse censorship we have today, but censoring the ‘Net is one step too far. With the current Net Regulation plan in the works, it would cost me 50 dollars a month just to browse sites such as this, MySpace, and YouTube. It is a rediculous fee to pay, especially during an economic Recession. What would I be without my blog or my vlogs?
One sad puppy, that’s who.
Why do this NOW?
Hey guys, for those who know me, watch my vlogs, or read my Myspace blog, you are probably wondering, “Isn’t this one too many blogs for one person?” The truth is, you are probably right, which is why I am taking the time to explain myself here. People think that I just do this “blog” thing as a side thing or just for kicks but to tell you the truth I am prettyh serious about letting my thoughts and opinions heard because in life I am only openly opinionated to my close friends and relatives. Things interest me. People intrigue me. Politicians make me wonder. Celebrities make me cringe. I digress.
I thought to myself one day, “What would be a better way to make this blog/vlog venture more official?” So I decided to follow in the footsteps of a person I admire and repect and created this WordPress Blog, which will include my vlogs as well as blogs I decide to type on the go. Thanks to all for having nothing better to do than watch my vlogs or read my blog, and I hope all you stay tuned for more of this circus I call “life”.
Vlog #24 (The Silent Vlog)
This vlog implements the use of annotations and must be viewed on youtube.com to encompass the complete essence of the vlog.
